Do not be deceived by this face. Cute, right? But there's a dark side to Ms. Ruby that many of you don't know about. Oh my, is it dark. Believe me, it's practically midnight oil (remember that old band? My older sister, Liz, had that cd when I was growing up and I remember thinking I had to listen and learn if I wanted to be "cool.").
Perhaps I should enlighten you. But be advised, it ain't gonna be pretty.
I call this catastrophe the Muted Mess Maker.
When will I learn that with Ruby around Silence = Disaster? Disaster is like Ruby's new Modus Operandi (doesn't it feel so much more sophisticated and pretentious to say that instead of plain old M.O.? Gosh, "M.O." is so yesterday.).
This picture doesn't even show the half of her sneaky mess. Henry said it was all Ruby's idea and I believe him. Yes, I do. Like Henry would put the blame on someone else. He's an honorable gent.
But the most fascinating part is how quickly Ruby transforms into her alter ego. One minute, she's walking around, holding Henry's hand, cute as can be:
And then the next minute she rips her hand out of Henry's, starts throwing toys, screaming bloody murder, and body slamming Tau. (I think she thinks she's secretly auditioning for the new American Gladiators. She wants her stage name to be Rubicon's Brass Ring.)
And then, suddenly, all is well in the life of Ruby and she's just as darling as before, just making a few important phone calls:
I think she's calling all of her posse, trying to set up her new non-profit, TAT, Toddlers Against Tattooing.
And then, just yesterday, Ms. Hyde reared her actually quite adorable, but still very naughty head. I had corralled her on my bed, her usual spot, while I took a shower. But there was nothing "usual" about this day. Ohhhhhhhh no. When I came out, I found this:
The only obvious question would be, "Well what, pray tell, did the Book of Ezekiel ever do to you Ms. Ruby?"
She ripped out three pages and then proceeded to rip those three pages in half and then dig her fingernail through five other pages of scripture. Quel sacrilege!
I can only imagine that she had just read verse 20. And if she hadn't read it, she needs to ... preferably substituting the word "daughter" in for "son" and "mother" in for "father." Maybe, just maybe, she might be forgiven of her offense.
So once again, don't let looks deceive you .... objects behind lens are not as innocent as they appear.
4 years ago